Those Milliband Boys

"I want to be wooed" I texted excitedly to M when it transpired that we had both, almost simultaneously,succumbed to the Labour Party's clever Facebook campaign to sign up new members. So many had voted Lib Dem either carried away by the Nick-Love floating around the non-Murdoch press or, like M(stuck in call-me-Dave's constituency), they voted tactically. My home city remained rose red but the post election maps showed us as a tiny dot of red floating in a large, depressing sea of blue. Now those Lib Dem voters needed to vent their disgust somewhere and Labour were ensuring they provided a useful outlet.
As for me I was just excited that I would have a say in the forthcoming leadership election. Never having once been doorstepped I was ready for some political wooing. Sadly, the first attempt left me feeling like a wallflower at a school disco.
"David Milliband wants me to take a journey with him!" messaged M.
What?! Why take M on a journey, why not me? Was I not good enough? Did she hold more political allure living in call-me-Dave's constituency? When my own not so personal message finally appeared half an hour later I felt less wooed, more used. It was sexy though.
"Yes I’d like your vote. But I’m not writing about that today - this is about something bigger.

I’m writing to ask you to join me on a journey to examine, redefine and rebuild our Party. Because to be frank – I need you."

He needed me. But hang on a minute. You wait desperately for attention from one Milliband brother then just like buses along comes another, equally needy.

" I hope that we’ll meet over the next couple of months" he cooed. It was short, it was sweet and most importantly he emailed me first. I felt wooed again.

It took a couple of days before the next starters made it out of the gates. Andy Burnham is apparently a very nice chap but Andy, its all about you. The email is full of "me, I, my". Andy, what about us? What can I do for you and you for me?I was sadly uninspired.

Mr Balls was fourth. Poor Ed, I wasn't predisposed towards him anyway, did he really scupper the coalition talks with the Lib Dems? It was a great message though."I am writing to you today - not just because I want your support to be the next Leader of our party, but because I need your urgent help in campaigning against the unfair attack on jobs and services that this Tory-Liberal government is planning for next week’s Budget." Ooh straight in there. Nice one Ed B.
And he went on "I am very proud of what we achieved together in government. Labour's legacy is every child who is sitting in a brand new school, the winter fuel payment, our new hospitals, our Sure Start children's centres, tax credits and the national minimum wage.
But the Tories and Liberals are going to put all this at risk.
So this is my first pledge to you: I will work with all of you and with MPs, MEPs, trade unionists and councillors across the country to make sure our legacy is not destroyed by David Cameron and Nick Clegg.
Labour needs a leader who will fight unfair Tory-Liberal cuts. We also need a leader who can make tough calls under pressure. And we need a leader who understands why too many ordinary, hard-working people thought they couldn’t support us this time.
We all met former supporters who thought we just didn't “get it" on jobs, migration, housing, tuition fees. I believe it’s possible to persuade former Labour voters to believe in us again - because I’ve seen the difference a Labour government made for my family.
My grandfather, a lorry driver, died from cancer when my father was only 10. Despite coming from a widowed family in a working-class community in Norwich, he was able to stay on at school at 16 and go to university.
All the opportunities that he had were only made possible because of the welfare state the Labour Government created in 1945, reflecting our core belief that opportunity should be available for all, not just for the privileged few.
The reason I’m standing for Labour leader is because I want these same chances for every one of my constituents and for every family in our country."

YES YES YES! I said definitely not Balls but this was far more like i, this is what I want to hear - fighting passion.
Last but not least Dianne. It took a while, I had to wait but finally, today I heard from her. It was short, to the point, ended "Yours in Comradeship" which was a lovely touch.
So here we are, five candidates, five messages, several weeks to go. Woo me would-be-leaders, woo me.